Thursday, March 18, 2010

CLEAN-UP CONTEST

"Really, why hire outsiders to do EVERYTHING when it comes to cleaning up? Especially when, with a little progressive thought, we can enjoy significant savings and efficiencies!" So said Willie P. Yankton, noted consultant to residential communities.

So here's what we are told S.O. is considering:

Each month, a $20 to $100 bill is placed in an empty soda can and thrown into the weeds on the grounds.

Kids will then "look for the loot" and will be given out trash bags as part of the program, which they fill with non-winners.

Monday, March 8, 2010

REWARDS!

Reward Yourself With A Permanent Monument.

Rewards, the premium seller of belt buckles and other fine Texas jewelry, in association with Spanish Oaks, will be offering a short run of personalized manhole covers. The partners project the covers will take on the look of a tribute 'seal' with a raised likeness of the buyer, and a listing of business and social milestones. The cover will then be set into the street as close to his or her home as the nearest manhole, at a ceremony to be attended by staff and neighbors.

Proceeds will help fund the "Help Take The Ruptcy Off The Bank" campaign.

AQUACULTURE TO THE RESCUE!

The need is money. Current reported banking woes which cloud good old new Spanish Oaks have led to some creative thinking!

Why not turn the fish camp into a MONEY MAKER?

It's an Amenity which is designed to look good in a Brochure. If you're a kid, or someone who likes to relax by a body of water that doesn't contain screaming kids, or lovers looking for a nesting place, or a fisher, then maybe you'll be sorry to learn that the master plan for financial restoration includes turning the Fish Camp into a Seahorse Farm.

It will require salting the water. The short SH gestation period makes Austin a perfect place to breed Seahorses for at least 7 months of the year. The former fish killed by salt will be made into cat food.

Friday, March 5, 2010

GOATS!

Owners may be forced to participate in the GOATS! program being contemplated for our community-within-guarded gates. In it, about 1500 goats would be allowed to run loose within the development. About 100 will be stationed by each gate, so when anyone comes to check on the Ag Exemption, they'll have a hard time getting down the road, giving the guard time to call to move the herd to the owners' property under investigation.

WE ARE WILD ABOUT GOATS! T-shirts will be worn by the guards to indicate the scope and embrace of the program.

The savings on lawn maintenance should recoup the investment within one year.

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

NOTHING HAPPENED TODAY

Spanish Oaks, Bee Cave TX. --- Nothing happened today. Representatives of Discovery Land Company were contacted for a reaction. VP of Company Profile, Lawrence A.H Horvath, responded to our inquiry:

"While nothing happened today, let me add that every day at Spanish Oaks has a certain special feel and that's even true for what we call "nothing." Our standard of luxury nothing, is part of who we are, as a steward of nature and an exclusive community for families, values, and, yes, golf."