SEA MONKEY PLANS ON HOLD

Plans to convert the fishing hole into a Sea Monkey breeding ground with adjacent mail-order station have been abandoned. "That's not to say we aren't looking for ways to decrease the assessments," said E.I. Somethingson, in a telephone interview. "Turns out we just don't have enough salt in that durn lake to grow them things which we all know are so popular, especially with kids. But we still have a lot of rocks to turn over as we look for some new money streams. Some of the things we're considering are Hill Country Snake Jerky; The Hill Country Golf Cart Demolition Derby; The Celebrity Cardboard Cutout Forest; and The Stare At The Houses You Can't Afford Dream Bus Tour."